What's in the cards? NL Predictions for the season.

How will our cardboard cronies do this year? Here are some
predictions. Maybe we're not the brightest bulbs on the baseball
tree, but at least Dinged Corners will do better than anyone on
CNBC or in the financial sector did in the predictions THEY made.

NL EAST

First, who will win the World Series?

The Mets, of course. Yes, we have to say that, but here are a few
reasons why it might not be outlandish (if they don't go into severe
clutch mode): It's the last 17-20 games that have done them in the
last couple of years. *see Dodgers entry below A big problem in this
regard has been the pitching.

But now we have Francisco Rodriguez and J.J. Pitch the Eighth
Inning. So, we're goin' with the home team on this one.

Second will be Cliff's adorable Phillies. No more rings for you
this year, Philliephans! Cole Hamels and Brett Myers will help get
them that far, along with Chase "Boo?" Utley.

They have a great bullpen, no denying that. Brad Lidge should be a
Met. But uh uh.

Third, well, let's go with the Junkie's Atlanta Braves despite
the team's hideous logo, which we can't believe they still use. As if.
Again, we're talking pitching here...Derek Lowe, Javier Vazquez,
Kenshin Kawakami...all very interesting.

The Marlins have to pin their low-rent hopes on young talent.
Ricky Nolasco, Chris Volstad, and the rest. Eh. Although we will
hope they do well because we want the wise and witty Tatiana to
be happy.

Oh, you Nationals. Mm mm. Sigh. Goodbye Jim Bowden and, er,
Jose Rijo. Of course, there is Adam Dunn. But not a factor this year.

CENTRAL

Milwaukee Brewers: no more CC. How far can Prince Fielder and
Ryan Braun take this team?

Cubbies. Great rotation. But Kerry Wood is with the Indians now.
Milton Bradley is a switch hitter and powerful but....dunno. Just not
feeling it.

St. Louis Cardinals: WE INTERRUPT THIS POSTGRAM FOR THESE
MAILDAY MESSAGES: MARIE FROM CARDBOARD PROBLEM SENT
US A LOVELY DAVID WRIGHT AND AN EXCELLENT CURTIS
GRANDERSON FOR NO GOOD REASON! Therefore we present this
for Marie:

The swagger combined with the friendly smile is pretty terrific. This
Card photo oughta be a card. Why may the Cardinals be a factor
this year? Albert. Chris Carpenter. Brendan Ryan.

Strong lineup. We'll see, but here's another case where we now feel
more positive about a team because of bloggergrrlz.

Reds. Johnny Cueto, Joey Votto, Jay Bruce. No Griffey, no Dunn.
Willy Taveras will steal things. They've got the mighty Micah! He is
going to do great things. Also, they have Nachos Grande.

Houston Astros: Ivan Rodriguez and his gold glove = good. But
All-Cute Team Member Brad Ausmus is with the Dodgers now, thus
decreasing our interest in Astroland by approximately 100 percent.
Still, the Astros have Mike Hampton, which could be helpful, and
Lance Berkman is always good news, but oh that Roy Oswalt. Final
assessment: no.

Pittsburgh Pirates: Our fondness for this team has to do with
Richie Hebner and Ralph Kiner, so as usual we live in the past. The
Pirates' ship likely will sink this year (sorry Billy) . However, by all
reports they do continue to have an excellent ballpark.

WEST

LA Dodgers, baby. Manny, Randy Wolf (what a GREAT name),
Chad, Clayton, and Hiroki all = powerhouse. We're sorry that
Takashi Saito is gone. *They are going to do well up until the end
of the season and will fall apart at the end, taking this minus mojo
from the Mets, who will emerge like the phoenix from the End of
The Season Ashes.

Dbacks. No more Micah, so we don't care. Dan Hairy. Brandon
Webb, the baseball equivalent of Sominex, although he pitches
well. Uninspiring. But let us be clear about one thing: we love Tim Rooks and will
continue to seek out cards for him.

San Francisco Giants. It's still hard to type "San Francisco" and
"Giants" in the same sentence, since we were raised in a NY Giants
family. But they do have Jeremy Affeldt and Tim Lincecum. They
also have All-Cute Star of All Time, Barry Zito, the Zeetster, the
cool Zee, who may surprise anyone at any given second and get his
mojo (aka zito) back. Word is he worked very hard over the winter.

Interestingly, the team signed Randy Johnson, as if attempting to
cancel out the cuteness factor of Barry Zito with MulletRJness. But
you know what? It won't work. ZITO EMERGES VICTORIOUS. Plus,
the Giants have Bailey.

Rockies. Much less interesting because adorable sweet All-Cute
All-Canadian Jeff

Francis is out of commission this season. And one of Lucy's top
three player-name players, Matt Holliday, moved to the A's. Brian
Fuentes is gone, replaced by Huston Street. If Tulowitzski manages
not to hurt himself, and if Todd Helton isn't weighed down by his
ego, they could do better this year.

Padres. Transitional. No. We are sorry.

Next up: AL assessment, which will include a shocking confession!
And the confession will not be about Ichiro. This is only a red
herring:

Yes, we did sort of steal the All-Cute idea from one of the best baseball fan blogs in
the galaxy, Marinerds, Etc. We apologize even as we continue to commit theft. Albert Pujols and Brendan Ryan
photos from CardinalsCandids.